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Post by Devious Diesel on Sept 12, 2007 21:22:11 GMT
OK, how 'bout this one? #26 CAPTION SUMMARY Fares please! Move right along the coaches please! James was thrilled when he heard they we're remaking 'James and the Coaches' and they were omitting the Fat Controller's role.
James: Now I won't be able to shower steamall over his top hat!
Unfortunately for him, he did shower steam all over a porter standing close by. Train ticket: $20 New coaches: $40,000 The look on James' face when he realizes he's about be stung by a bee: Priceless. James: brilliant, they're all models so I can do what I like and not get told off. END OF CAPTIONS
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Post by Old Square Wheels on Sept 26, 2007 3:14:17 GMT
In lieu of the live show arriving in Australia... #30 CAPTION SUMMARY To Diesel's amusement, the Fat Controllers dance movements led to rather embarrassing consequences! Diesel was delighted to see that the Fat Controller had forgotten what he was supposed to say next. TFC: “My doctor has forbidden me to perform!” TFC: Quick, a toilet, I'm touching cloth! THE FAT CONTROLLER: “Wiggles, help me. I've just split my pants”. TFC: You know what. I really don't like diesels. Driver: Err, sir. TFC: Oh god. There's one right behind me isn't there!! TFC: Oh no kids! Diesel has returned to sodor for the 1,284th time with a weird face! Diesel: He's not fat enough to be the Fat Controller. Seize the impostor! Trousers: 20 pounds Diesel: 10, 000 pounds Having a Fat Controller impostor rip his pants while Diesel is stoned: PRICELESS! Diesel watches with wicked glee as the Fat Controller is run over by his own car. Diesel chuckled as Sir Topham Hatt's tribute to the late, great Marcel Marceau went completely over the heads of the toddler audience. Diesel had just introduced the Fat Controller to “Nigel”...his pet tarantula. TFC actor: oh no its my agent, he's done enough damage. go get him diesel. A Notorious Bank Robber met a sticky end when he disguised himself as the Fat Controller and suddenly realized where he'd ended up. END OF CAPTIONS
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Post by Chris on Oct 9, 2007 13:39:01 GMT
It's been a while since I did one, so I hope no one minds me putting up a new piccie... #33 CAPTION SUMMARYThe recent rain on Sodor had been a little heavier than expected. Fat Controller: *sigh* There goes my no claims bonus.
or
Bertie: Arrgh! Duck! Duck on car: Where?!? Bertie: Lead me through a lake will you? Bloody Sat Nav! Bertie: Driver, can I just go through the puddle and have a drink? BERTIE: “Ruddy hovercraft, swanning about, thinking he's better than me...” Ducks: Hey, would you mind towing us out of here?
Bertie: Oh, of course. Right after I help the frogs catch their train... Narrator: ...and that is how Bertie got involved in the cover-up of The Fat Controller's death! Sir Topham Hatt's road rage had gone a bit too far. BERTIE: “Dilly, are you sure this is where you want me to drop you off?” Bertie: a puddle? in an indoor set? I think the roof needs repairing. END OF CAPTIONS
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Post by bocodiseasel on Oct 12, 2007 16:29:59 GMT
I havn't seen a new post in a while so, I hope no-one minds if I post a new pic: #34 CAPTION SUMMARY ”Welcome, future Jedi, to your 'Using The Force' training video! After watching this instructional tape, you'll soon be able to bend the Force to your will as well as this guy can!” Tennis Player: OH SHI-
Or...
Audience (off-screen): COME ON, TIM! Tennis player: (thinking) Oh great! If that photographer has me at the angle I think he does, I'm gonna be the subject of a lot of caption contests on the internet. I'd better stop pulling this face too. Actually, why I am bothering to think of all this stuff me now? There's a ball heading straight for my h...*whack* BALL: Oi, I have to hit THIS brute in the face? After this, I'm SO asking for a raise... ”Holy undercrackers, Batman! It's Tennisball-head!” Tennis Player:I am using the force to move this ball with my mind when the star trek makeup dept ran out of klingon head ridges, the actor wished they hadn't bothered to find an alterntive. END OF CAPTIONS
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Post by Culdee Fell on Oct 14, 2007 23:14:07 GMT
#35 CAPTION SUMMARY IN SRIES !2 THER WIL BEE A NOO CHARACHTER CALED HERMIO THE SQUARENGINE The original characters conceived by Awdry were: Toby the Underworld Engine Thomas the Homocidal Engine (yes, his wheels are soaked with blood) Hermes the Plastic Surgery Engine, and Francisco the Pimp Engine
Oddly, these characters were knocked back by the pubishers... The Fat Controller has since learned to never look out his window while under the influence of LSD... The Fat Controller thought he had a little too much to drink after seeing Thomas, Toby, James, and especially Edward looking just a little strange. In a parallel universe...far far away...where the laws of physics and biology were totally different to our own... Newsreal: After the series ended, Thomas and Toby joined a new show called Wrong Side of the Tracks. After Endok and his friends proved to have become quite popular parody characters on SiF, the other Wikipedia characters experienced minimal success as well. What happens if you type "Google" into Google and break the internet? You get sucked into Wikipedia and meet them, that's what! When Reverend Awdry divided by zero...
OR
"Toby, Thomas, Hermes and Francisco. Four engines living happily on the Island of Sodor despite their massive structural flaws and design errors. However, what they will soon realise is that they don't actually exist, more rather, there are pure fallacies existing only within the minds of one Brian Falzon, a small boy with such a passion for Thomas the Tank Engine, that it is noted by family and friends as 'quite disturbing'." "But such is the natural order... IN THE TWILIGHT ZONE." The new 2007 christmas blockbuster: Thomas and the island of misfit engines!!
Felix Cheng was pleased with the artist's depictions of:
Thomas' brother Tomas, Toby's brother Eric, Umberto the green engine and Squegg the red engine. Behold!Wikpedia has finally made some convincing enough looking fake characters:o It's Timmy,Thomas' twin,Jimmy the Tenderless squarefaced engine,Luigi the Italian engine,and Tabitha,Toby's sister When Toby, Thomas, James and Henry heard that they were wanted by the FBI, they decided to go undercover... As you can see, HIT Entertainment is having trouble coming up with new characters for Series 12. "Be afraid, be very afraid." The parrallel universe version of 'Thomas and Friends' has made it across the void and into our universe! "The sequel of the 1932 movie "Freaks", is released in engine form." END OF CAPTIONS
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Post by Chris on Oct 24, 2007 0:19:49 GMT
Here's a new one to have a go at. #36 CAPTION SUMMARY Murdoch:Japanese speaking sheep?Things only get wierder and wierder....... Murdoch: “Ok, now I know that I'm DEFINATELY lost!” Murdoch: Oh bugger. Sheep AND floating japanese symbols. Do any of you know Shinkansen the Offscreen Bullet Train? Ha! Murdoch will never find Amarillo now he's lost in Japan! Is this the way to Amarillo? Maybe not but I'm nearin' Tokyo... Murdoch suddenly realised that he had wandered into Japan Town. Murdoch: So THIS is the effect of sniffing lead paint... Not only is Murdoch a Locomon in disguise, but he can also use Taomon's signature move, 'Lethal Cards'...
... Then he woke up and decided never to speak to Salty again... MURDOCH: Oh, great! Even sheep can speak better Japanese than I can! Hit's Attempt at a Bilingual Thomas and Friends didn't quite work as planned...
Sheep: !!??!?!?!::
Murdoch: Mr Director, I already told you I only speak English! Murdoch: Sir, I think that the sheep you've ordered from the Mainland came from somewhere else. MURDOCH: “Can I get some peace and quiet anywhere in the world?” Murdoch: Japanese sheep? I don't think i'm in Wales anymore! Murdoch: Where's that translating Toby when you need him?!
It was at this moment Murdoch realised his mistake by accidentally puffing onto the set of the Japanese production of 'Baa baa black sheep' (There is one there)
Murdoch: I knew I should have taken that Japanese language subject in the Engine Training facility... Murdoch: Oh great, first they ask me to learn Japanese, now they expect me to know Sheepanese? This is why you should never ask directions from animals that never speak the same language as you in the first place, even worse if they're from another country.
Murdoch: “Ah great........ what's “Mint Sauce” in Japanese again?”. Ooh goody, bonus points!... except... how can I get them when I'm on the... oh. Murdoch: Driver, I think I've found the set props for Takeshi's Castle! Newsreal: Murdoch joins sheep to avoid a mental brake down. END OF CAPTIONS
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Leonard
Goods Engine
What it is, soul brother.
Posts: 158
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Post by Leonard on Oct 29, 2007 2:27:28 GMT
I've got a new one: #37 CAPTION SUMMARYIntroducing: Doherty the Crack Engine! SKARLOEY-”This ought to scare Duncan. It worked for Thomas, so it should work for me.” “Ok, so burying me in the sand wasn't such a good idea...” Newsreal: Skarloey joins new Sodor gang, the Dust Flakes! __________________ Newsreal: After HiT makes budget cuts, the engines are forced to find extra jobs to make ends meet. SKARLOEY: No officer, I swear I'm not high... Everyone soon realized what Skarloey was doing during his trips to Columbia
Skarloey: Hey everyone, I just found The Fat Controller's flour stash Shut up guys! I swear, the only thing Nancy gave me last night was a polishing! Skarloey: Hmm, now I know how Percy felt when he crashed into that lime cart, got hay stuck to him, and crashed through that chocolate facotry. Skarloey: You know, rehab just wasn't my thing... SKARLOEY'S DRIVER: “Skarloey, have you been eating icing sugar, again?” This takes the RS style Percy impersenations too far Skarloey: I swear to you, it's only sherbert!! To everyone's surprise, Skarloey didn't seem to care about his accident at the Fat Controller's Birthday Party and that Sir Topham Hatt will have to wait another 12 months for a replacement cake to be made... Skarloey: I just had to get myself stuck in another snowdrift! This last bit won't come off! Skarloey: What? It's only Carpet Fresh! END OF CAPTIONS
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Post by Devious Diesel on Nov 25, 2007 18:15:24 GMT
And let's see if we can keep this one Thomas related... #40 CAPTION SUMMARY Unfortunately, the Season 12 episode “Thomas and the Atomic Bomb” turned out to be yet another episode where Thomas 'learns' not to rush... This is what RS purists will do to HiT HQ in 2010 Movie announcer: This December, tensions will mount...Sodor's defense system will be put to the ultimate test...and confusion and delay beyond anyone's imagination will ensue. Thomas returns to the big screen in “War on Sodor: The Avengers of Forgotten Characters”. Coming soon to a theater near you... TFC: (Upon the Explosion) Alright, who replaced the coal with blaster bombs?! TFC: “This explosion has caused confusion and delay!”
”Luckily, no-one was hurt!” TFC: Oh dear there goes the trucks full of fireworks and gunpowder.
Thomas: Don't worry sir, at least it was Dennis pulling the train and not me. And nobody ever found Endok's remains...
The Fat Controller: Taco Bell...never again... As you can see, the Sodor Baked Bean-Eating Contest did not end well. ”You stupid script writers, now what are we to do with no Island Sets?”
“Err............” Someone thought it would be funny to place several bombs inside Emily's firebox. When Emily met Eliot...
or
“In future, Thomas decided he would not ram nitroglycerine wagons.” *Sources have arisen from the huge explosion last week caused by the destruction of Thomas the Tank Engine, who had allegedly been turned evil by Diesel 10 and went on a rampage on the railway. This photo was taken by a bird watcher on the afternoon, and the said explosion is said to have caused 'confusion and delay'- especially for the nearby HIT meeting.* HiT's plan to dispose of the models for the axed characters in a way that would not arouse suspicion had one tiny flaw... The HIT Executives began to regret letting Gerry Anderson write the new scripts for the Latest Series. After Thomas & Friends was cancelled, HIT Entertainment decided to turn Sodor into an atom bomb test site. HiT EXECUTIVE: “Guess the revamp bombed.” It was then they realized the mistake of making the new game Grand Theft Auto: Sodor City have a mission where Bertie has to deliver the explosives trailer, and this is what happens when the screen says Mission Failed! or Wasted! END OF CAPTIONS
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Post by Devious Diesel on Dec 16, 2007 13:32:49 GMT
Another one from me. Kudos for Chris for posting the picture in the first place #42 CAPTION SUMMARY After reading what was to be his lines in the 'Great Discovery' special, The Fat Controller felt quite offended and turned away. His lackeys were disappointed too and went ahead to shout and curse at the grey sky. Henry was nearby, wondering what all the fuss is about, when he backed into a ladder and caused confusion and delay... TFC: Some day I'll finish getting those extra tracks laid out. Lackey with umbrella: That's what you said about getting HiT to keep BoCo. Where is he now!? Other Lackey: Oh stuff it! this track here seems to go far out more. Lackey with umbrella: Ya! Six inches! Excuse me, Sir, the Fat Controller is not taking any questions about the purported takeover of Britt Alcroft Inc. by Gullane, so please get that camera out of here and move along! The engines were worried about TFC taking management tips from Steve McClaren. Sir Toppam was unimpressed with the Stationmaster's 'Mary Poppins' impression... Unfortunately, The Fat Controller's audition for the lead role in “Singing in the Rain” didn't go well. The Fat Controller wondered whether his bodyguards were making themselves look too conspicuous.
or
TFC: I wonder who these two idiots are that follow me around everywhere... Sir Topham Hatt: This is boring. I'm leaving! Bodyguard with Umbrella: Yes, sir! Second Bodyguard: Here is the way to the exit, sir. Fat Controller: Meeting adjoured, Wiggles! Now to grab a sandwich before I go out to eat. Guy with umbrella: So sorry everyone, but Sir Topham Hatt has urgent business to attend to. TFC: Stop breaking the fourth wall! We've got to get back to the office! Second Guy: Yeah, or we'll miss Billy Connolly! BODYGUARD WITH UMBRELLA: Sir, someone is trying to make a caption about you. FAT CONTROLLER: Don't be rediculous. TFC: You do know, don't you Wiggles, that you an get fined up to £200 for trespassing on my railway. Guy with umbrella: Whoa look at the size of that apple pie, sir. It's so huge! The Fat Controller: I'm not falling for that old trick. Other Guy: We're serious, just look behind you. END OF CAPTIONS
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Post by Chris on Dec 22, 2007 13:54:34 GMT
S'pose it's an appropriate time to switch to a Christmas related pic: #43 CAPTION SUMMARY FATHER CHRISTMAS: “And what would you like from Father Christmas this year?” THE FAT CONTROLLER: “The narrow gauge railway, please.” FATHER CHRISTMAS: “Didn't you ask for that a few years back?” THE FAT CONTROLLER: “Just do it, tubby.” Guard: Don't worry, Father Christmas, he's just a litte shy... Fat Controller: “My God. He really let himself go.” FAT CONTROLLER: Oh, so they were your mince pies? ”Sorry, the job of “Fat-Man-In-Suit-Who-Can-Be-Everywhere-At-Once” is already taken.”
“Well, I don't believe in you either”
“It's my long-lost twin!” Fat Controler:Hey cousin! That Santa suit looks really convincing! TFC: It'sch laike looking in t't blooming mirror! Who knew the Fat Controller's long lost twin brother was really Santa Calus?! TFC: At least you only have to have that weight once a year.... Santa: That's what you wished for one christmas wasn't it Stephen?? TFC: Jeez, the things you do as a child always come back to bit you in the arse later...... Guess that Christmas wish to lose 20 pounds never came true for you, eh Topham? The judges still hadn't decided on a winner for the “World's Fattest Fictional Character” competition. TFC: Father is that you? Workmen: Here we go again...
I swear that Father Christmas is Topham in disguise. Newsreel: Fat Controller meets his double. Santa: *heavy breathing* “...Topham...I am your father...” ”Does this suit make me look fat?”
“You have caused confusion and disorder”
“Hey, if they can make a belt that goes around someone like that, why can't the make one for me?”
Fat Controller: Sorry buddy, but this is a “Holiday” special, not a Christmas special. You'll have to leave now. Fat Controller: But Santa! I said that I wanted a load of coal this year! SANTA (angry): “Topham, did you eat my milk and cookies?” TFC: Oh please, no one could possibly really be that fat... oh.
or
TFC: This episode aint big enough for the both of us. Being The Fat Controller is very much like being Santa; no-one will believe you're real if you aren't fat enough. THE FAT CONTROLLER: “And I want a year's supply of cream buns, and the Narrow Gauge Railway back, and personalities for my two henchmen...” Father Christmas: I told you, Topham! The first gift of Christmas is just for one of the CHILDREN. The Fat Controller: Eh, we could always just skip filming a remake of “The Polar Express”. TFC: “Shir, with today'sh current overly P.C. environment, I'm going to have to ashk you to leave sho as you don't offend a minority group...”
Or
The Fat Controller looked at Santa with malice in his eyes “If Santa is dead,” he thought, “then perhaps I will ride his sleigh..” END OF CAPTIONS
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douglas
Main Line Engine
Posts: 2,256
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Post by douglas on Jan 2, 2008 23:12:32 GMT
Probably time for a new one, seeing as it's 2008 and a week and a half past Christmas... CAPTION FUN 2008 #44 ...but a winter one, nonetheless. "Whoa... Percy was wrong, there is a beyond..."CAPTION SUMMARYThe Sun have uncovered that children's television character ''Gordon the Big Blue Engine'' had been snorting cocaine.
PLOP
Gordon: "d**n! That bird left a big one!"GORDON: "Oh my God! I can see giant people!" "Whoa... Percy was wrong, there is a beyond..." After feeling the side effects, Gordon regreted buying that 'special' flour from 'Arry and Bert. From the writers of "Percy’s Chocolate Crunch", comes: Gordon's Sherbet Shower! Gordon now regrets that infamous meeting with Pete Doherty At the Tidmouth Karaoke night, Gordon hadn't been expecting special effects when he sang 'White Christmas'...
DaisyFan x Gordon: *looks up* Iceberg, right ahead! Gordon: Good Lord! Dandruff! Oh look, caption summaries...nice.
GORDON: OI! You, up there! Have some decency, use some Selsun Blue, would you?! Just as Gordon was about to die in a terrible avalanche he devised the perfect way to overthrow HiT. Sadly no-one was around to hear his plan... The first of the "Adult Moral" episodes-In future, Gordon decided he would not do drugs. Gordon: And you know what the worst thing is? It isn't even real snow. I'm being halted by by a cheap studio imitation. END OF CAPTIONS
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Nanaki
Main Line Engine
Just wolfing around.
Posts: 1,515
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Post by Nanaki on Jan 17, 2008 2:53:09 GMT
Maybe it's time for a new image? #45 Operator: Well Ned, how are you going to tell Miss Jenny that you destroyed her office? Ned: How did you know it was me? Operator: The shingles next to you gave it away.
Not my best, I know. Operator: Now what have you done, Ned? Another one of your accidents I see? Ned: Not me. Honest. Operator: Don't try and pull that one on me. You're not Warrior. I think watching TUGS has gone straight to your head. Wait until Ms. Jenny hears about this! Operator: Now Ned, I know you're not hiding anything up there in that bucket of yours... Ned: *whistles innocently* WORKMAN: "I'm sorry, sir, but you failed the audition for the new Bob the Builder character." Workman: Ned, this is no time to be standing around making fish faces! Workman: NED! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH THE SLATE!
Ned: *thinking* Curses! He found out! Time to destroy the witness! *speaking* Nothing Sir! Just...stand right there and close your eyes for a minute...
---
It was at that moment Ned realised that crime doesn't pay- at least not for damaged slate. He'd have to do that himself. BANKSMAN: Ned, I told you to go before we started filming! Ned: Two more roles and that's it? Aww... Newsreel: Union worker caught talking to machinery
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Operator: You tak'n to me? Ned: "And that's why you shouldn't build construction machinery out of slate, Sir!" Operator: Did you destroy this slate? Ned: No, the kids hated their old fashioned way of writing in school. "It then occurred to Ned that he could simply run over the foreman if he bothered him" Foreman: Calm down dear, it's only a commercial.
Ned: Look, MUM! I'M ON THE TELLY! ned: I'll huff, and I'll puff and I'll blow your house in, that'll teach you not to blame me for everything.
workman: Thats the last time we'll show you 'the three little pigs'. Ned: And if you weren't fixed with shouting your head off at me you'd have noticed my crane arm, towering directly above your head. *SPLAT* Workman: Now, back a bit. <Ned rolls backwards> Workman: That's it - back a bit, come on - back a bit, <Collision heard> Workman: Stop! Too far!
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Sodor18
Branch Line Engine
Always ready to lend a helping arm
Posts: 1,279
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Post by Sodor18 on Feb 1, 2008 22:50:10 GMT
Time for a new photo: #48 CAPTION SUMMARYThe Sodor Express, carrying a full load of passengers came off the rails today on the bridge above Misty Valley. It rolled over several times before finally coming to a rest at the bottom with extensive damage to the train and passenger cars.
Luckily, no one was hurt. (Runs from angry mob) People on train: And we thought Series 5 of Thomas was scary! This has caused confusion and delay! person on train: Why do i feel like I'm in a really bad episode of 'thunderbirds'? In a world where railroad bridges mysteriously collapse... and trains are swallowed up by the mountains... one person can stop all the madness...
Starring Sylvester Stallone [as he is swallowed by mountain] "I coulda been a CONTENDA!" Arnold Schwarznegger... "Oh my God! The mountain eet ees eeting mah best friend! I weel KEEL eet!"
in... LITTLE TRAINRIDER BOY [/u][/size][/quote] Falcon, we told you NOT to look at the view! And in an instant, Harry Potter and all of Hogwarts' students were no more. This is EXACTLY the reason why Lord Harry needs to be scrapped as soon as possible! MATHs TEACHER: "Okay, Mr. Hobbs. If a train was pulling six coaches and two fell off the bridge, how many coaches would be left?" Engine Driver: Dammit, why didn't they get that bridge fixed after Skarloey dangled from it?!
TFC (Looking at image): So THATS where those red Express coaches from the first 3 seasons went! (I'm referring to the ones with larger square windows, which IIRC did disappear in the series)
It was at that moment everyone realised that visiting the Skarloey railway and ignoring the fact the NG engines had had 6 bridge incidents in the past was a regretful move... Here comes the express! And there it goes....right off the edge of the bridge. Oooh dear. Where's the Doomsday Project when you need it. The Fat Controller, unfortunately, never revoked his decision on giving coaches the same punishments as the trucks. So Much for "Luckily, No One Was Hurt" Workman: Now, back a bit. <Train rolls backwards> Workman: That's it - back a bit, come on - back a bit, <Bridge collapses> Workman: Stop! Too far!
Recycling captions for an hilarious future! After seeing the photo, The Fat Controller regretted letting the contestants of The Biggest Loser sit at the back of the train. I can't believe we didn't tell you guys about what else happened in Wales... I can't believe we didn't tell you guys about what else happened in Wales...
That is why they only let me handle the whistle instead afterward...! Hatt very quickly regretted the choice of Michael Bay as director for the NWR's new television commercial - a budget of millions, excellent - the need for seven helicopters, outstanding - but did he really need to throw half the Wild Nor' Wester off a viaduct!
*
ANGELIS (clears throat, then speaks in a deadpan tone): Unfortunately people were hurt. Many people in fact. Local hospitals swelled to bursting. Gordon's driver was crushed against the backplate by the coal and received third-degree burns. The regulator impaled the fireman through his leg and several dozen passenger were severely injured. The screams echoed in the unhappy vale of tears for hours.
(pause - he looks around at the traumatised expressions of the recording staff)
ANGELIS: What - you're sacking me in favour of 007 you bast**ds - you thought I'd go quietly!?
*
Sodor, the real location of 'The Cassandra Crossing'
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Thomas doesn't make kids afraid of train accidents - train accidents make kids afraid of train accidents!
*
In an attempt to save more money to spend on maintaining an increasing decrepit motive power fleet, Hatt agreed to subcontract track upkeep to Network Rail.
Two weeks later...
*
TFC: Thomas, I want you to take this train of human cattle...I mean 'government-sanctioned-meat-product', to the viaduct above the meat-canning-plant and then push them down the slope into the grinder.
Thomas puffed away cheerily to the viaduct - the only thing he enjoyed more than making the children happy was playing 'Grim Reaper'. Girl looking out of window: "I knew it was a mistake to drive past the "men at work" sign. We did more on the footplate rides than you might think! END OF CAPTIONS
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Post by Christopher on Feb 27, 2008 21:13:25 GMT
The moment I saw this pic, it was dying to be captioned ;D #50© HenryBlue "Phew! That was a whopper of a sneeze!" CAPTION SUMMARYPERCY: I've heard of Gordon's dome blowing away, but this is just plain ridiculous! Percy: ADAM! DON'T TAKE A PHOTO NOW
or
This proved percy had no brain lurking inside him... Poor old Percy thought he was having a good day- until he looked back...
Percy: Hehe, let's see Dalby draw me like a caterpillar with stripes now!
It was at that moment Percy realise he wasn't feeling unusually chilly because of global warming... much to everyones amazement, Percy was revealed as an electric engine in disguise.
or
Percy begins his new career as a topless model Percy put your boiler back on! Due to buget cuts, the Fat Controller is now selling his engines... bit by bit! My Percy, you look fantastic! You've lost so much weight! How did you do it? . . . Oh... The Fat Controller's eating spree went a little over the top... "I say, is my boiler showing?" SODOR NEWS BOILER EXPLOSION REVEALS STEAM ENGINE TO BE FAKE Percy the Small engine suffered a horrendous boiler explosion yesterday. Luckily, no-one was hurt, but the explosion revealed that the little green saddletank was actually running on a twelve volt electric motor. Percy said "They were bound to find out one day". in an interview the railway controller, Sir Topham Hatt, said "Even I didn't know about this. Crafty little beggar deceived us all." So THIS is what HiT mean by "his engine"... Percy won't be smiling anymore once he's found out he's been accused of public nudity... Giggity giggity giggity giggity..... Giggity giggity giggity giggity.....
"Alllll right."
"Who else but Percy?"HIT PRODUCER: Hah! We TOLD you Steam engines had engines! Percy: When The Fat Controller said he was personally going to clean the chocolate off of me I didn't think he was going to eat me boiler and all! ---------------- Percy: One day at work I was hit by a crane and I suffered damage to my boiler. I could not work for a month and a half due to the injuries. Luckily, I called the National Accident Helpline and they helped my sue the arse off of my boss and the crane driver. I now have a new boiler, a mansion, three flash cars, a jaccuzi and most of the girls from Playboy. I'm well chuffed! That is the LAST TIME I sleep in Diesel 10's sheds!! Percy poses for "Playboiler" adult magazine. END OF CAPTIONS
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Iceman
Goods Engine
Chill Out
Posts: 488
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Post by Iceman on Mar 1, 2008 7:30:49 GMT
How 'bout a new pic. #51Courtesy to Henry3 (Majhost.com) from whom's folder I found the pic. My Quote... Percy couldn't help but think he'd make a terrible Easter Bunny CAPTION SUMMARYWarning! Toilet Humour Follows!
"I TOLD Fatty the septic tank was overflowing!" It's Percy. Chocolatey goodness for all! PERCY: "I was wrong. This isn't going to scare Thomas." Percy: That was....without a doubt....the most strangest factory tour I had ever taken!
It was at that moment Percy realised that despite the fact he had intended to crash through the factory just to taste chocolate, he had had his mouth closed the entire way through...
Percy: I can just tell some experienced modeller is gonna make fun of me by making a model like this!
(PS, the last is based on truth, as topkazfatt from Youtube actually has done a Chocolate Covered Percy, check it out: Percy: "The people governing Political Correctness are NOT going to like me being in 'black-face'!" Choco-cocaine? BAD idea from the start. PERCY: "Oh, I hate taking the S*** Train!" Percy: I am NEVER taking a shortcut through the sewage works again. ----- Percy: I hope Fatty isn't hungry when he sees me. Guess this new paint job won't get me a spot on Thomas the Chav Engine 2... "Strange, I haven't heard anyone say that annoying line 'luckily no one was hurt' maybe I ran someone over." New product from Willy Wonka: Chocolate-covered Percy. Enjoy! ;D "This is what I get for trying to see what Chocolate looks like when it's in the factory" "I don't know which one is going to be more worse after this: The Oompa Loompas coming out to take me away or the Fat Controller wanting to clean me off himself!" Percy's plan to gatecrash Mr. Wonka's factory without a golden ticket resulted in choco-covered lawsuits. PERCY: I told you we should have gone right! DRIVER: I said I was sorry. Thanks to Percy, Valentine's Day on Sodor was a bust. END OF CAPTIONS
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Post by Jim on Mar 10, 2008 11:28:16 GMT
How 'bout time for a new one? (from one of the annuals - with a little something x-tra added ) #53 click image to view full size CAPTION SUMMARYTHOMAS: I knew I should have told the Fat Controller I was scared of clowns. In future, Thomas decidied he would not eat cheese before bedtime. HiT announces a new spin-off of Thomas and Friends, Thomas Monkey-faced Engine!Thomas: Hello, I'm here to volunteer for the circus. Ringleader: Ah you must be here for the freak audition, do kindly take a siding next to Mighty Mac over there. It was at this precise moment that Thomas realised he was scared of clowns and they had stolen Annie & Clarabel. "Congratulations Thomas! You're the millionth visitor to the Docks!" I think the Coachman from Pinochio wants to capture me so he can sell me to the circus to a life of hard labor! (lol, none of you noticed my little pic alteration yet: click the image to see a larger version - maybe this will give you a clue )
Thomas was beginning to get creeped-out when the carnies began calling him 'Dave'. Wow! Britt Allcroft would certainly be pissed to see this sight, as I heard she's been campaigning against circuses. Thomas: *whistles innocently* I hope the workmen don't notice what I did to their laundry! THOMAS: "I know the Fat Controller says the workmen are a bunch of clowns, but I didn't think he meant it like that!" CLOWN: You're my wife now, Dave!
THOMAS: This is a local Harbour for local people, we'll have no trouble here! Thomas: *singing* Casey Junior's comin' down the track Comin' down the track With a smokey stack! "This is definately the last time I cover for Salty" END OF CAPTIONShee -it seems that only Ryan picked up on my clue which can be seen on the wall to the left of the clown holding the balloons. Here it is
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Churchy
Main Line Engine
Posts: 2,063
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Post by Churchy on Mar 13, 2008 17:29:17 GMT
I think it's time for a new pic, so... #54 Donald: I'm verra far fra scotlaund noo! CAPTION SUMMARYHiT's multicultural policy is a bit too much. Thomas: WHOA!! Donald, where are we? Donald: Haud yer wheesht!! The Fat Controller ate Chinese take-oot again, he's mediatin'. Thomas: Don't you mean "meditating?" Donald: No. TFC: Oooooooooooohhhhhmmm. Chow Mein. Donald: Dis gives a 'ole new mean'n to Big Budda!
********* Donald: Gotta get away while old man Budda's asleep. Budda: Zzzzz... I just hope I don't fall in one of those Jusenkyo springs like Duck and Rusty! It was at that moment Donald regretted going all that way to India, to find out the buddha culture exhibition was closed... --- Fat Controller: Quick! Drop me off here! I wanna rub his belly and get good luck! TFC: Donald, I want you to haul this statue to Tidmouth. Donald: I dinna think I canna manage the weight, Sirr! TFC: Nonsense. He ain't heavy, he's my Buddha ( ref: song by the Hollies ) Donald's driver: I dinnae think we're in sodor any more, Dona' Donald: "You'll nae fin yir enlightenmen' here. Believe me." Hey, waht happened to mine, I';ll just say it agin...
Donald: I don't thin we're on Sodor any more Douggie. Donald: 'Oly Christopher's Audri's glasses! Iz Fatti! Donald: This guy makes Fatty look thin The midnight goods eventually arrived - 10 days later in India END OF CAPTIONS
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Post by CPK on Mar 21, 2008 20:11:34 GMT
It's been over a week, so let's have a new picture: #55 CAPTION SUMMARYThomas the Tank Engine, never leave anywhere without him.
(reference to telly advert) There are some things money can't buy, for everything else there's HiT entertainment. Sodor, the place you want to be. It's Thomas the Bank Engine (for real this time). Earn 'Rail Miles' with every purchase.
Fine print: This card may only be used 1) to purchase Thomas and Friends merchandise sold exclusively by licensed ©HiT Entertainment distributors, and 2) at Thomas Land theme parks. Cardholder agrees not to patronize Preservation Railways who opted out of DOWT events under the terms dictated therein by © HiT Entertainment. Oh yeah, there is a $500.00 per annum licensing fee for the use of the © Thomas the Tank Engine image charged to the cardholder. Thomas the Tank Engine. The Offical Mascot of Visa. The newest set of adventures from Thomas and his friends, coming April 2008!
Thomas & Friends Sell Out News Reporter: This just in, Thomas the Tank Engine's alleged stalker, the purple US Dock Tank who calls herself 'Rosie', was arrested yesterday afternoon after trying to get a gender change to sound like Thomas. Her credit card (shown) was found in her bunker and confescated, and when Thomas was shown it he became even more scared of the situation. Sir Topham 'Tubby' Hatt is currently investigating the situation with the police. He left no comments apart from: "It's bloody HIT's fault." --- It was at that moment Thomas realised all the effort to get himself a personalised credit card had gone to waste because he remembered he had no hands... So that's how Fatty pays for all those accidents and new engines! You know your obessed with Thomas when...
You have him on your Bank cards. Thomas- The banker you can trust! Thomas: And save your money. Then I make some money by getting it from you. END OF CAPTIONS
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Iceman
Goods Engine
Chill Out
Posts: 488
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Post by Iceman on Mar 25, 2008 9:01:43 GMT
#56No one can prove it was me CAPTION SUMMARYAfter waking up in Rosie's shed, Gordon started to wish he hadn't drunk so much the night before. Narrator: ... Then there was trouble ... With fewer wrinkles than in Series One, Gordon hoped nobody would find out about those botox jabs... Gordon: I've...seen things..you would NEVER want to see...the Fat Controller....getting a tan...with no clothes on....the horror....*shiver*
It was at that moment Gordon realised that there was only one way to get the Fat Controller to let him get a repaint and another tender: puppy-dog eyes... Newsreal: Chidren's show character in scandal over botox injections. Gordon practices his ventriloquism act for the Sodor Talent Show. GORDON: "You'd better give it five minutes everyone, I was in there longer than I expected!" The hands......they were so cold! Now, let me think... the square root of the 5th logarithm of 10 to the power of 6.5 divided by the cube of a parabolic locus where y is equal to 58 while x is equal to 12, when divided by i - the square root of negative 1 - and then multiplied by the standard deviation of the numbers 4, 5, 3, 6, 4, 4, 2 and 8 added to e and then multiplied by pi is... can I have more time please? The sum of life + the universe + everything =42? That can't be right, or CAN it? Gordon: But... It wasn't me who destroyed that barn and killed all those workers! Honest! No Fatty, YOU have caused confusion and delay! END OF CAPTIONS
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Post by Christopher on Apr 4, 2008 13:02:25 GMT
Okey-Dokey. Rack your brains on this one: #57 BULSTRODE: I was brought out of the storage cupboard for this!?? DIESEL 10: Oh, shaddup, and keep smiling! CAPTION SUMMARY"I know I said I loved doing my final scene in 'Thomas and the Magic Railroad', but this is ridiculous!" Hey! I'm a model!
or
Diesel 10: My claw 'aint working. Bulstrode: Why did you think I was smiling?! The wonders of genetic engineering. A Dieseloat! Following on from there...
Our new Season 12 character: Deistrode 10 The new breakthrough in destruction technology! Dieselstrode 2000! It can break down foundations and eat away at the landscape! Newsreal: Diesel 10 has joind the Navy. Diesel 10:of all the boats I could have landed on, this was the worst.....
Bulstode: How do you think I feel? I've got a maniac riding in my hold bulstode= how could they mistake me for lord stinker, what do they think i am, a garage barge.
diesel 10= what do u mean by garage barge. Diesel 10: Does this 'Flying Kipper' train ever go to plan? News Reporter: This just in, the NWR has been rocked, by discovering Diesel 10 trying to be illegally imported back into Sodor on a previously defunct barge scrapped years ago for illegal parking. The Police and Sir Topham 'Fatty' Hatt are investigating the case and negotiating the entering of the diesel into Sodor...
Bulstrode: Oof! And I thought those trucks were heavy!
It was at that moment the Japanese Toy Company realised they had pushed the element of Sodor realism and accuracy over the line... What has science done THIS time?! END OF CAPTIONS
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