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Post by Alaric on May 19, 2008 12:10:31 GMT
Greetings, those that are members of the New Sodor Island Forums. No doubt you have heard of me, but allow me to introduce myself to any pitiful clods who may not understand. I am the greatest scientific mind the world has ever known. I am the ruler of Latveria, future ruler of Earth. I am the one true sovereign of all I see. I am he whom men call Doom! I have been sent to this strange and new world after an attack by the Fantastic Four. Naturally I was well equipped to swiftly deal with my most hated foes, my legions of robots proving superior to that foolish quartet. Yet as Doom stood on the brink of victory, I found myself cheated by that blasted Richards! His dimensional translocator somehow tore through my defenses, no doubt by means of trickery, and sent me hurtling into this strange new realm. But Doom is never defeated so easily! I shall return to my universe in due course, ready to avenge myself against that accursed team. Until then, however, I see lands fit to conquer! I have studied this land and its people, and now seek to use it for my own gain. You have already felt the sting of Doom's wrath. Not too long ago I did make my attack on your superheroes (which in this dimension are somewhat oddly referred to as Moderators and Administrators. A curious name, but beneath Doom's concern). Though it is true that I was not successful, the next time we meet, it shall be Doom who is victor! See how even now I have infiltrated your precious Evaluators! Vengeance shall be mine, Administrators! Until my ultimate victory over this land, I have set up this thread so that you may learn more about the magnificence that is Doom. I shall allow you to ask questions of me, and of course, to swear your eternal loyalty to your future ruler. Surrender unto me now, and I may show mercy. Oppose me, and you shall be destroyed. For rest assured, this is no mere member imitating the greatest of all men. I am the one, the only, the true Doctor Doom!
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Post by Jim on May 19, 2008 13:49:37 GMT
Dear Doctor Doom,
I have a serious question for you.
Do you find having to wear those Latvenium gauntleted gloves all the time annoying? By that I mean for the dexterity normally required to pick up small objects or to turn pages in a book.
Typing on a keyboard must also be problematic - you've undoubtedly seen Ben Grimm's posts on YouTube and TV.com - you'd swear that they were typed by a N00B. Not so with this post - how do you do it?
Best,
TT
P.S. Were you to be given a vanity (ha ha) plate for your automobile, what would it say?
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Post by Alaric on May 19, 2008 15:40:03 GMT
Dear insignificant worm TT, Such base concerns as picking up small objects and turning pages in books are beneath Doom. You seem to forget that Doom has many, many lackeys for which to attend to any dropped objects of miniscule structure. As for books, Doom has them read out to him by the finest voices in all of Latveria. My own! For all the books in my vast library have been replaced with audio versions, reab by my own dulcet tones. Your question about keyboards is also foolish. You think Doom would settle for a common keyboard? All my technology is voice controlled, including such primitive tasks as typing. As you are well aware, I am very skilled at dictation. Ha! Ha! Laugh at the wit of Doom!
Until you are overthrown, Doctor Victor Von Doom.
P.S. Fool! You believe Doom travels around in a mere automobile? I travel only under my own means, and occasionally in a giant airbase. The one that shall bring you to your knees in worship of Doom! However, for occasions of state in Latveria, I do resort to the simple automobile. The platest say simply...Doom. For that is all my car need say. I did once however have a novelty bumper sticker declaring that, if the message was legible, then the reader had been run over by Doom! Never let it be said that I am above humour.
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Post by Aidan on May 19, 2008 18:10:53 GMT
Dear Dr. Doom,
Enclosed in this envelope is all the money and jewels there are in the world. In addition to this, I shall offer my loyalty.
Yours truly,
Aidan
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Post by Casey Jones on May 19, 2008 19:39:06 GMT
Dear Doctor Doom; In closed is a paper clip, a rubber band and a straw. I don't know how it'll help you take over the world but you'll know what to do. -Casey Jones
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Revolver
Passenger Engine
Unhappy moth is unhappy.
Posts: 516
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Post by Revolver on May 19, 2008 19:57:09 GMT
Dear Doctor Doom,
Do you know, that if your fighting the Fantastic 4, they can go behind you and beat you? Seriously, your helmet gives you a big ol' blind spot.
Arlesdale92
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Post by Alaric on May 19, 2008 20:03:49 GMT
To the fool known as Aidan-Bah! You think these paltry trinkets are enough to please Doom?! However, I shall accept your offer of loyalty...if you prove it! You must bring me the head of one of these accursed Moderators, who even now try to prevent my ascension. They are proving to be even more troublesome than that blasted Richards!
To the fool known as CaseyJones-You underestimate the intelligence of Doom. A mistake you shall live to regret, as I torment you with the very instruments you offered to me! How, you ask? That knowledge is for Doom and Doom alone. However, you would be ill-advised to east any low-fat yoghurts henceforth.
To the contemptible fool known as arlesdale92-Insolent clod! You think Doom's armour does not inform him of any such attacks? Rest assured, should the accursed Fantastic Four try any rear attacks, they shall find themselves on the wrong side of my palm-blasters. The ones I shall use to bring about your destruction. Such is the fate of all who displease Doom!
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Post by Cläy on May 19, 2008 22:12:41 GMT
Dear Mr Doom, As you are quite clearly the most brilliant of those who have sworn to oppose the moderators, we were hoping you could settle a small argument. You see, we are trying to find the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow, and we are not sure whether it being African or European makes any difference to the answer. My colleague, a Mr. Wheels, Old Square, believes that the swallow does not change markedly between Africa and Europe. I contend that it must change, otherwise both swallows would cohabitate all through both continents. So whilst I continue to distract you with this long and rambling question, may I ask my fellow moderators to subdue you with taser guns and ropes?
...
*looks at sprawled out bodies on the ground*
That went well.
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Post by Knuckles on May 19, 2008 23:10:19 GMT
Swear your eternal loyalty to your future ruler. Surrender unto me now, and I may show mercy. Oppose me, and you shall be destroyed. For rest assured, this is no mere member imitating the greatest of all men. I am the one, the only, the true Doctor Doom! Dear Mr Doom, I unlike alot of people are not at all phased at your pompous threats, how calous and ignorant of you to think that an ex soldier and Iraq veteren like myself should bow down to such an impostor! I promise you now, I hold no allegence to you or your soon to be enforced regime and scheeming. I offer you the chance to change your ways before things get serious, how dare you threaten the piece, prosperity and fellowship of SiF-city. yours sincerly, Knuckles (RWS type) P.S- I emplore you to reconsider your ways Dr Doom
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Assassin
Branch Line Engine
Posts: 1,255
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Post by Assassin on May 19, 2008 23:14:54 GMT
*Calls Fantastic Four*
What are you going to do now?
*Gets into bomb shelter*
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Post by Knuckles on May 19, 2008 23:23:34 GMT
Hopefully nothing, hopefully as unlikely as it is he will back down and see the error of his ways, we of SiF need not to surrender in perpetual fear but to stick together, care to join me? infact, [glow=red,2,300]PM[/glow] me if you have the courage to stand up to such a monster, I'll write up a list of comrades in preparation! DR DOOM, with respect I emplore with sincerty to re-evaluate yourself, I and indeed others don't want blood on our hands, piece we strive for
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Assassin
Branch Line Engine
Posts: 1,255
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Post by Assassin on May 19, 2008 23:27:02 GMT
*Come out of bomb shelter holding comically oversized explosive*
Right! I'm ready to go!
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gotSTEAM?
Branch Line Engine
Still dreaming <3
Posts: 1,234
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Post by gotSTEAM? on May 19, 2008 23:40:49 GMT
Dear Dr. Doom
Do you like women who can cook? I can cook quite well ^_^
~Elizabeth
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Post by Alaric on May 20, 2008 7:33:01 GMT
To the pitiful fool known as Clay-Firstly, it's Doctor Doom. Doctor! Second, you believe Doom so easy tricked? Be thankful that your puny efforts amuse Doom, that he shall not instantly destroy you where you stand.
To the upstarting fool known as Knuckles-Ah, a challenger approaches! You are also fortunate I do not blast you now for insulting me. Your talk of striving for peace appeals to me. There is no reason this need be a bloody takeover. I am quite willing to assume my new throne peacefully, and would do so if it weren't for those blasted administrators! However, if you wish to negotiate a deal, I will be willing to compromise. Come alone to the small clearing in the forest, far away from the city. Bring no weapons.
To the pathetic fool Assassin-I do not fear the calling of my enemies, being as they are in another dimension. However, even if they were to show up, I am unafraid. Doom will do what Doom always does-defeat the accursed Fantastic Four with minimal effort. At least, Doom would do so if his enemies were honourable and respectful, which he cannot say about that blasted Richards!
To the one known as gotSTEAM?-It is true that I appreciate a good cook. Very well, you are accepted into Doom's minions. I am nothing if not chivalrous.
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Post by trainzfan on May 20, 2008 10:02:49 GMT
Dear Dr Doom,
I haven't been feeling well lately. My Stomach has been painful, my nose clogged and my throat hurts. Can you prescribe anything?
Trainzfan
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Post by Halstead on May 20, 2008 10:27:47 GMT
Deer Doctor Doom
There are two individuals in my local area who are terrorising the townsfolk with their mopeds and stealing my Beano comics. I'd like to take them out using Chaos Emeralds but fear that I'll get blood on my nice frock, so what's the most environmentally friendly way of taking out these two morons without ruining my clothes and contributing to climate change?
Yours sincerely, Sir Halstead.
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Post by driveus on May 20, 2008 11:22:36 GMT
Dear Docta Dume,
I have travelled billions of galexies to ask a very important question that concerns the entire universe. That doll barbie, what's the name of her little sister?
Sincerely, The guy who's about to get sued by Warner Brothers
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Post by Knuckles on May 20, 2008 11:35:31 GMT
To the upstarting fool known as Knuckles-Ah, a challenger approaches! You are also fortunate I do not blast you now for insulting me. Your talk of striving for peace appeals to me. There is no reason this need be a bloody takeover. I am quite willing to assume my new throne peacefully, and would do so if it weren't for those blasted administrators!However, if you wish to negotiate a deal, I will be willing to compromise. Come alone to the small clearing in the forest, far away from the city. Bring no weapons. Dear Doctor Doom! I am glad you wish for peace, however, if we do nothing and let a Tyranical Dictator such as your self take over then we are nothing but mugs, YOU threaten our ways that have been for century's, SiF City and its inhabitants are already a peacefull community, we don't and will not accept somebody that demands respect, it would only be fake respect anyhow, nothing in the heart would be correct. I am apalled how alot of SiF's inhabitants are swiftly being wrapped up in your deceptive cloak, believing in your false sense of security, you indeed are are worker of the dark one! We have a democratic government, that means things are voted for and discussed, not forced upon by flight of fancy, I admit our appointed Governor (Mr Ryan Healy) can sometimes 'Dictate' his influence upon us, however, he is a most respected asset to our community and you are threatening it! I'll take up your offer in the woods, however, I might have to send one of my diplomats for personal security reasons, I understand your strength, in numbers however should things turn that way I promise you, you will not win us over. RECONSIDER
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Revolver
Passenger Engine
Unhappy moth is unhappy.
Posts: 516
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Post by Revolver on May 20, 2008 18:42:37 GMT
Dear Doctor Doom,
Can you really be called a doctor? Don't you remember the Silver Surfer healed your face in the 2nd movie, your not a doctor, your a phony! A big fat phony!!!!
Sincerely Arlesdale92
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Post by Cläy on May 20, 2008 22:50:17 GMT
To the pitiful fool known as Clay-Firstly, it's Doctor Doom. Doctor! Second, you believe Doom so easy tricked? Be thankful that your puny efforts amuse Doom, that he shall not instantly destroy you where you stand. Dear Mr Doom (I refuse to call you 'Doctor' until you go to the other side of the island and... CURE CANCER!), It was always obvious that the attempted distraction was doomed to be a failure, hence the multitude of moderator shaped bodies currently lying on the ground. I am nothing if not realistic. However, I have a new question for you. One that will test your wits, bring you to the brink of insanity (or in your case, over it), and challenge your perception on the world itself! So without further ado... Would Sir prefer a red wine or a white?
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