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Post by Le Bateau à Voile on Jan 18, 2014 6:57:12 GMT
I'm going to be that one idiot who says something stupid amidst people's real problems and whatnot, but in day to day life, these are all sound pieces of good advice, believe me :'D I know because I speak from experience for all of them.
Never push on a drawer that is stuck. It will shut really fast and send you thonking your head into the dresser or closet or what have you.
Never walk down stairs really fast. Explanation not needed.
Never sew without a thimble. Sleeping Beauty herself would look at you and be like "Dayum."
Never fart when you're sitting on wooden anything. It will be so loud you can't even believe.
Never go to the store with a plastic baggie full of quarters. People will give you the evil eye.
Never drink water when you're a passenger in a car waiting at a stoplight. Chances are, they'll start when you're mid-swallow and you'll get doused all down the front of your shirt.
Never hold onto a ceiling fan while fixing a light. If it turns on you'll be spinning.
Never futz around like a dumbass with anything old and fragile.
Never try to take a big thing down from a shelf. It might have a lot of little things on it and in that case you will be pelted.
That's all I've got for now but I imagine I'll probably have more to add to the list as I go about my life doing stupid things.
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SRapi
Main Line Engine
Pronounced: Ess-Are-Ay-Pie.
Posts: 1,543
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Post by SRapi on May 9, 2014 15:26:23 GMT
I agree with you very much about not walking down the stairs fast. Especially with socks on. I've had a few close calls before. I don't know if this should have gone in the advice thread or General Chatter, but it's just a personal problem that I felt like getting off my chest as well as hearing other opinions on. So, I've long held an interest in voice acting. I went to film school and studied camera and writing, but I love animation and have always tried to get myself to do voiceovers for friends' projects whenever I could. Despite this interest, I've never felt like anyone else ever believed that I was particularly good at it, and I'm not saying I'm the best, but I think I'm good enough to at least get a compliment on it every now and then. Okay, I do get a compliment every now and then on it, but I feel like it's always with the sentiment, "that's a good voice that you can do for your friends but don't quit your day job." Now a few days ago, I was hanging out with a couple of my friends, one of whom actually does VO for a living. We were relaxing and talking, and started doing impressions (which we always do). Out of nowhere, she turns to my one friend and says, "you should do voiceovers! You're really good at it!" And right there, boom, it felt like someone punched me in the stomach. I'll admit that my friend can do some good impressions, but everyone's got a few up their sleeve. He has no interest in doing voice work, and here she is telling him he should look into it! Whereas I, who have actually thrown the idea around before, have never once gotten a comment like that from her. And her opinion really matters to me since she's a pro. Granted, I've never told her about my interest because I feel so amateurish compared to her that it would be embarrassing. Since that day, I've been debating in my head about whether I should just throw that dream away or not. I mean, I never thought I could be a completely full-time VO guy, but I thought I'd be able to do a few freelance gigs every now and then. But since that day, I'm thinking that maybe the reason I don't get as many comments as I'd like is because maybe I don't have that knack. Maybe I don't have the talent that I think I do, and I'm never someone to toot my own horn. I'm very modest, and I even sometimes squirm when people compliment my other work. They're both very good friends of mine, but that one comment really stung when I heard it, and it's really made me question one of my interests very hard. Am I taking it too personally? Can one person's compliment to another be the straw that broke the camel's back? I'm not looking for pity, I'm not trying to make myself sound sad to get complimented. I'd really like to know if anyone else has a had a similar situation- where one of their interests/hobbies that they thought they were good at was called into question by the outside world.
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Lua
Goods Engine
Posts: 114
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Post by Lua on Jun 22, 2014 17:23:41 GMT
SRapi, I suppose I understand your situation to an extent (though it's mostly me being an entitled brat and frustrated at my school/country's education system for not supporting my interests). The advice I can give you (and take it with a grain of salt) is that if that one remark from your friend is the catalyst of you seriously doubting yourself then there probably is an underlying cause behind it. If you keep questioning yourself every step of the way then you will never think you're good enough. Keeping other people's opinions in mind is all well and good but you shouldn't base your entire perception of yourself off of what people think of you. (That's what I did, and ultimately it did more harm than good trying to live up to everybody's expectations.) I mean, if you have this longtime intention of doing something, and you worked really hard trying to make it come true, and then you end up not going through with it you'll more likely than not regret it and start wondering (which was also exactly what I did). Anyway, I needed to get this off my chest. Now's a good time as any. Warning for the wall of text below! My parents' relationship has been very strained as of recently, and they've been using me to vent their issues about each other. I don't like it because they often ask me about what I have to say and then they bring up my name when they argue. My sisters are never subject to this because they're "too young" and apparently, I'm old enough to understand who is wrong and who is right in this situation. My mother objects to my father leaving home at night to visit his friends' houses until late, something he's been doing since as long as I can remember. To be honest I never considered it was wrong of my father to go out late at night because he's been doing it for so long and so often. She planned several Family Nights that ended up doing more harm than good (because my father is taking part halfheartedly and my parents can barely quell the tension between them). She considers him selfish for prioritizing social life over family and overall considers him a bad husband and father. Recently she's starting to rekindle her devotion to organized religion, something I'm personally against since (among other reasons) she seems to be turning to it purely because of desperation (also because my father is far from religious, another thing my mother dislikes about him). My father on the other hand, thinks that my mother is being entitled and hypocritical (she's been in Jogja to work on her degree since about a few months ago, visiting every couple weeks. She was there for a better part of 2013 as well. She'll probably be coming back for the holidays next month) and that she has no right to speak after "shirking her responsibilities as a housekeeper and a mother". He doesn't like the fact that she's always pointing fingers towards him every time something remotely bad happens at home, or how she's constantly keeping a close watch on the household she currently isn't present in. (He's also voiced some of his rather sexist opinions of her on me.) It's grating when my father does something that makes me think he's concerned about me and my sisters, only to reveal that it's to make sure my mother doesn't get on his case later. It just seems wholly insincere. My parents apparently have no problem fighting in the living room, though such instances are rare. I try my best to ignore them. I've already made it clear that I don't want to be used as a pawn whenever they get into an argument, but I'm not confident the message got through. I don't understand how two people who are, in my mother's words, "absolutely incompatible" with each other choose to marry, have three children and live under the same roof for seventeen years and counting. I don't know what to do (or what I can do). It's selfish but I just don't want to get involved in this lest I make things worse. I honestly don't even care anymore if they end up divorcing if it means the arguing will stop.
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Post by Culdee Fell on Jun 22, 2014 20:49:06 GMT
I'm sorry to hear about that Syndomatic. I don't really have any advice for you, but I hope things improve. You have my sympathies.
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Post by PercyFan1998 on Jun 23, 2014 3:04:19 GMT
Lua, I can empathize with your situation, I myself am often a pawn, mostly with my fathers side of the arguement, as he often gets mad at my mom's so-called lack of work, even though it's bs simce he does nothing around the house, sigh. My humblest sympathy's.
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Lua
Goods Engine
Posts: 114
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Post by Lua on Jun 23, 2014 9:17:47 GMT
Thanks Culdee Fell and scrapbricks. Things aren't actually all that bad right now since they're not under the same roof. Obviously I want them to stop fighting but looking at things right now it's more wishful thinking than anything. At least she'll make me macaroni schotel when she gets back.
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Andrej
Passenger Engine
Posts: 871
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Post by Andrej on Aug 4, 2014 3:23:25 GMT
Right, I've got an issue I would like some advice with. Back in April, I posted this in the "Fears" thread. -Death. My #1 fear would be, without a doubt, death. I'm an atheist so I believe that this is all there is, though I'm not particularly pleased about that. The idea of never seeing my loved ones and friends once they're gone is a terrifying idea to me, (more so than any threats of an eternity in hell), so, in that respect, I wouldn't mind being proven wrong. Something which I find equally terrifying is the possibility that all of this will be gone one day. You can condemn me for being "materialistic" or whatever, but I'm not at all thrilled about the prospect that one day, everything I've worked for or loved in the course of my life will be taken away from me like *that*. This especially applies to friends and family, but for material objects as well - all my hobbies, that project I spent a lot of time working on that I'm really proud of, all the movies and songs and TV shows and books that I love, etc etc. Maybe it's childish, selfish and/or stupid, but it's a genuine fear of mine, and there's nothing I can really do about it besides coming to terms with it and enjoying these things as best as I can while I'm still around (and hoping beyond hope that if there is an afterlife, you get to take your stuff with you). This has become an issue especially over the last few weeks and I don't really understand why - I'm still young and I have a long time in which I can worry about death, why now? Well, things haven't gotten much better. I've made progress in that enjoying myself and then the prompt realization that I will be gone one day doesn't immediately launch me into one of my melancholy moods, but that's about as far as I've gotten. These thoughts bother me on a frequent basis... I was in Florida on vacation at the start of July and while I managed to enjoy myself for the most part, almost every night I would go to bed in a melancholy mood... you all can probably guess what started it. My family made a stopover in New York and the last 2 days before we arrived there, as well as the next 2-3 days after the trip were the only days in recent memory that didn't consist of unwanted thoughts at the back of my mind. I just can't come to terms with the idea that I and all the people, places and things I love will one day cease to exist. Does anyone know how to get over my fear of death? My mom and sister both say that they can't imagine being immortal, and while that's a position I have a very difficult time understanding at this point in time I would not mind thinking like that at all. Please help (and yes, I am aware of all the downsides of immortality...)
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Post by Rusty Red Scrap Iron on Aug 4, 2014 11:57:59 GMT
I'm going to try my best to help you out, sounds like you really need it.
Firstly whilst your dwelling about your fear of death, life is passing you by. You'll be missing great moments out in the world by being stuck in the corner dwelling about something that you don't know how its going to be, when its going to come and knowing that it'll probably be something you can't do about it. My Grandfather once said: "If you can't do anything about it, why worry about it?"
We all have our fear of death, even those of us who believe in God. But no matter whether your a believer or an atheist, your loved ones are always there when you need them. Though can't see them in person if they've passed on, they know that your thinking about them. Have you ever thought of visiting their graves if your near them where they've been buried or cremated? I don't much about atheism, but they do say that a change is a good of a rest.
As for the possessions part, all that you worked hard for will live on. They may not be with you when you ascend to the after world, but sometimes you just don't know. When my Nan died whilst I was on holiday when I was 11, I lost a Darth Vader action figure. I was really upset about it, but to this day I believe that my Nan took him with her when she died (I of course did get a replacement figure in the end).
But my advice is to live life to fullest for as long as you walk upon this world, dwelling on something that will happen someday will leave you with regrets for missing those moments that will have such an impact on your life. I know its easier said than done, but its all you can do until when your time comes. Speaking as a Believer, those that have ascended to the afterlife are always with you when you need them - even for those are atheist. But sometimes it could be a calling that needs answering from somebody beyond, and its probably time for you to heed that call.
I hope this has some help, if it doesn't then I apologise for any inconvenience.
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Andrej
Passenger Engine
Posts: 871
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Post by Andrej on Aug 10, 2014 13:35:00 GMT
Hi RRSI,
Thanks for the advice. It means a lot. I'll try to live my life to the fullest that I can. I've actually been watching a lot of comedy videos in recent times and that seems to have done a good job deflecting my melancholy moods - I'll definitely do more of that. Thanks again.
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SRapi
Main Line Engine
Pronounced: Ess-Are-Ay-Pie.
Posts: 1,543
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Post by SRapi on Oct 23, 2014 16:51:33 GMT
SRapi, I suppose I understand your situation to an extent (though it's mostly me being an entitled brat and frustrated at my school/country's education system for not supporting my interests). The advice I can give you (and take it with a grain of salt) is that if that one remark from your friend is the catalyst of you seriously doubting yourself then there probably is an underlying cause behind it. If you keep questioning yourself every step of the way then you will never think you're good enough. Keeping other people's opinions in mind is all well and good but you shouldn't base your entire perception of yourself off of what people think of you. (That's what I did, and ultimately it did more harm than good trying to live up to everybody's expectations.) I mean, if you have this longtime intention of doing something, and you worked really hard trying to make it come true, and then you end up not going through with it you'll more likely than not regret it and start wondering (which was also exactly what I did). Thanks for the reply, Lua. Sorry for the late reply, I don't go online as much as I used to. I guess because the idea of doing VO for a living would mean a lot of work and complete deviation from my current life path, it's a very daunting concept. Lot's of responsibility and investment, so I think I feel like I need nothing but praise and encouragement from others around me to feel like this is something worth pursuing. I think it'll be a minor passion in my life and I'll think about it for a while, but nothing I can commit to now. Just something to put on the back burner when I have more resources at hand. And good luck with your fighting issue. I know how hard it is to see your parents fighting a lot, and certainly fighting with them myself. I've often wondered when my parents will get a divorce, because while the lulls are peaceful and happy, the fights are explosive. I hope things will figure themselves out.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Jan 12, 2015 15:40:46 GMT
As I'm trying to lose some weight this quarter, I've got a few tips if you want to get into shape: 1. Watch what you eat! Fairly obvious, but just keep an eye on how much fat & sugar you eat each day, and try to eat some fruit and vegtables. An example in my case is Dinner consisting of sliced meat or fish, with potatoes cooked in the oven & peas or baked beans. Do this & you'll be fine - it doesn't stop me eating at Subway every day I'm at College... 2. Take drinks easy - go for Diet Cola rather than regular Cola. Fruit juice, water & milk are fine too - you can even get some hot chocolate made by Options that's low in calories, and still delicious! 3. It's not all about exercise - my Dad told me last night that the best form of exercise is in fact walking - try taking stairs rather than lifts & if you have a dog, take it for a nice long walk every so often, like I do round the lake in the park not far from my home. 4. It's OK to snack! - things like breadsticks, different flavoured rice cakes & jelly are great for when you're peckish. If you want, you can even have a biscuit, little chocolate bar or similar every day. I do & it doesn't have too big an effect... Take this advice on board if you're trying to lose weight. Just by doing this, I've lost 3lbs in one week alone! Who knows how much I'll have lost in a few weeks time!
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Post by Nykrivas on Jan 16, 2015 23:32:46 GMT
As I'm trying to lose some weight this quarter, I've got a few tips if you want to get into shape: 1. Watch what you eat! Fairly obvious, but just keep an eye on how much fat & sugar you eat each day, and try to eat some fruit and vegtables. An example in my case is Dinner consisting of sliced meat or fish, with potatoes cooked in the oven & peas or baked beans. Do this & you'll be fine - it doesn't stop me eating at Subway every day I'm at College... 2. Take drinks easy - go for Diet Cola rather than regular Cola. Fruit juice, water & milk are fine too - you can even get some hot chocolate made by Options that's low in calories, and still delicious! 3. It's not all about exercise - my Dad told me last night that the best form of exercise is in fact walking - try taking stairs rather than lifts & if you have a dog, take it for a nice long walk every so often, like I do round the lake in the park not far from my home. 4. It's OK to snack! - things like breadsticks, different flavoured rice cakes & jelly are great for when you're peckish. If you want, you can even have a biscuit, little chocolate bar or similar every day. I do & it doesn't have too big an effect... Take this advice on board if you're trying to lose weight. Just by doing this, I've lost 3lbs in one week alone! Who knows how much I'll have lost in a few weeks time! I'd suggest you stop with the Diet Sodas, unlike Regular sodas which use sugar, Diet Sodas use a sugar substitute that could cause cancer, it's not good thing to drink them on a routine basis. The Juice and Milk are fine, but instead of Diet Soda, drink a cup of coffee or tea in the morning. Also I suggest adding protein powders in your milk or if you're making smoothies. Your body at least needs protein and energy to burn.
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SRapi
Main Line Engine
Pronounced: Ess-Are-Ay-Pie.
Posts: 1,543
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Post by SRapi on Nov 12, 2023 22:37:29 GMT
Does anyone have any good tips on dealing with procrastination? I'm a chronic procrastinator, and I know most people interpret that as just plain laziness or irresponsibility, but it has truly been negatively affecting my life and feels almost out of my control. I'm considering going to therapy to deal with it, but at the moment, that isn't an option. So between now and whenever I do manage to get some professional help, I just wanted to ask around and see if anyone on here had some advice on how they deal with the time thief.
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Post by Nicholas on Nov 13, 2023 0:08:32 GMT
Does anyone have any good tips on dealing with procrastination? I'm a chronic procrastinator, and I know most people interpret that as just plain laziness or irresponsibility, but it has truly been negatively affecting my life and feels almost out of my control. I'm considering going to therapy to deal with it, but at the moment, that isn't an option. So between now and whenever I do manage to get some professional help, I just wanted to ask around and see if anyone on here had some advice on how they deal with the time thief. Firstly, admitting, both publicly and to yourself, as you seem to have here, that you are guilty of procrastination is already a kind of progress. Acknowledging and accepting it seems a necessary first step. You've identified the who. I will, here, work on the basis that it is the case that you are not just using your time unproductively, but that you are doing so to avoid or delay other tasks, as procrastination, in its nature, should mean. Therefore, I have assumed that in response to when you are procrastinating, the answer would be when you have other more productive things to be doing. It is worth considering how you procrastinate. What is it that you are doing instead? Once you've identified this, it might be worth trying to make the things that are distracting you either less within your eyeline or making them less appealing when they are in your eyeline. If you're in your workplace, try to ensure that your workspace is clear, that everything you need to confront the task is organised and around you. I tend to feel that your environment (i.e. the physical space you are inhabiting) can affect your mindset and headspace (i.e. the mental space you are inhabiting). I believe studies have shown, for instance, that people tend to sleep better in a bedroom they know is organised, as part of your head is usually working to map your surroundings; the more your head knows where things are, the more that cog in your mind is at ease and you can focus on sleeping. Social media devices either on your person or in your environment could also be an issue, as I've observed it often is for many. One YouTube video I came across recently has some of the kind of ideas that may be useful to you: I'd say many of the things suggested in this video I do, to an extent, do already anyway: although it's very infrequent I am in reception range for calls anyway (although I am usually always close to WiFi), my 'phone usually lives on silent, I always have to press the side button and enter the pin to access it (bar the camera shortcut which it can be handy to fire up in a pinch), I am generally against unnecessary "apps" and the appearance of the home screen is quite basic. I don't greyscale the screen, but the backgrounds are fairly neutral anyway and I usually have the screen set quite dim. So, if you're being drawn to something that is visually appealing but that you're just spending your life zoning out to and scrolling through, try to make it less readily accessible so that you really have to think about what you're doing to do it and turn down the 'glam' on it to make it seem less inviting.Out of the many available reasons, it is also worth identifying why you procrastinate. It could be the case, for instance, that you find the task that you feel you should be doing boring and repetitive, stressful and anxiety-inducing or daunting and overwhelming. Are you wasting time trying to over-perfect something? Are you self-criticising and relying on the validation and support of others as motivation? Have you 'overbooked' yourself, leaving you feeling like you never have enough time to focus on one thing? Has the novelty of the task worn off so you seek the novelty of something else? When you do realise you are procrastinating, try to stop and honestly consider "Well, why am I not doing the thing I should be doing? What was the point where my attention on that task became derailed and what was I feeling at that point? What lured me towards the procrastination?" Each answer of why may require its own remedy, but I would perceive the solution to often involve creating and adhering to a system of structuring. If, for instance, the answer is that you find the task overwhelming or daunting, it may be worth examining how you approach the tasks that you are putting off. Often, breaking a big problem that a person has to undertake into smaller problems, and working through it comprehensively and gradually in stages, can make it seem much more manageable. And when it's more manageable, you may procrastinate less. Between each 'stage', take a break as well, but make sure you're keeping a casual eye on that break so that it doesn't overrun and you just end up slipping back into procrastinating again. At my workplace, we often work off of a notepad on which we not only make notes where necessary during telephone conversations but also outline a 'to do' list for the day. I find lists very useful in keeping myself organised in the workplace. Similarly, the application for memos in my mobile telephone is frequently adopted for list-keeping (one of the few "apps" that can be considered to not necessarily be a counterproductive one). Try to ensure you're being realistic about what you can do in what time, too; again, try to lay it all out and break it down, making sure you're prioritising that which you ought to be. If you need help, try to make sure you're asking for it. That goes not only for the task if you need someone to share it with, but if you are doing the task alone anyway, someone can still help you by checking you're not slipping back into procrastinating every so and often and that you're remaining on track. I cannot claim to be a professional in these kinds of matters, but hopefully some of these musings and pointers may prove useful towards your efforts.
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SRapi
Main Line Engine
Pronounced: Ess-Are-Ay-Pie.
Posts: 1,543
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Post by SRapi on Nov 13, 2023 7:48:47 GMT
Nicholas, thank you for the incredibly detailed response! Not what I was expecting and much appreciated. You've given me a lot to think of. I will say some of this is stuff I've tried to think of before, others new. My main choice of procrastination is YouTube honestly. I throw up a window, and can just spend hours binging content. A majority of this happens during work, and since my job is remote and my hours are flexible, I've been able to get away with this level of procrastination for a while now. A definite contributor to that is my frustration with my job and my desire to move on, but none of my job applications have been successful yet. But I even procrastinate on applying to new jobs, and even on my own hobbies as well. That's one of the reasons why I thought about going to therapy, to figure out the why as you pointed out (fear of failure?). This might be TMI for this forum, but I do appreciate the input. I watched the video, and I might look into the Unhooked Chrome extension now. But, I've got a lot of thinking to do.
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